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solace in gold

from mankind is the disease by Humanity Defiled

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about

It is never easy growing up with a parent who suffers from mental health issues. It is even harder when, after years of exemplary abstinence, that parent finally succumbs to alcoholism. I say this because it is a plague that runs in my family.

This disease has been biting its way through my family tree for ages, and I honestly thought the rotting had ended with the death of my mother's mother (whom as a consequence I have never known). Indeed, this event, to my mother, was so traumatizing, that she never fully recovered from her sadness.

For years my sisters and I were taught the detrimental nature of alcohol abuse. And up until my more rebellious years, I had even been a loyal student. So when our mother then inevitably fell into the bottomless vat – pun intended – I thought her a hypocrite.
How dare she preach to us while she had become a sinner herself? Excuses and explanations ensued, perhaps even rational ones, but my anger had made me deaf to reason.

'Solace in Gold' talks about my frustration with an alcoholic mother and how I percieved her at a time when she was lowest. It is an anger I regret, but refuse to erase from my memory. How would I make sure to never forget this chapter in my life? Well, by putting it in song of course!

lyrics

backs turn away
feel only shame
in solitude
she treads again

it calls for her
solace in gold
forget the gnawing
and numb the escape

She's longing for slumber
prospect of eternity
deserving of rest
all but pretext

rational thought
slowly vacates her mind
a grip so fragile
now plainly slipping
away

are we the weak?
We see her vascillate
bystanders of fatigue?
Or just the ones who push her over the edge?

She's longing for slumber
prospect of eternity
deserving of rest
all but pretext

credits

from mankind is the disease, released November 15, 2019
Lyrics, vocals & liner notes by Wim Vandenbranden

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humanity defiled Belgium

Humanity Defiled is a one-man death metal project from Belgium.

The sole purpose of the music is to channel negativity and to create some decent death metal along the way.

Hope you enjoy it.

Questions? Contact me through xiweinx@gmail.com ... more

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